Signs You Need to Release Anger
Have you ever shouted at someone because they parked in your parking spot at work? Or perhaps your teenager doesn’t seem to want to listen to you? Does this make you angry?
Anger is a natural response to a situation, perceived threat (real or not), or directed at another person. Perhaps they may have said or did something that triggered an anger response in you.
Regardless of the cause, it’s how we handle this intense anger that matters the most. Repressing it and keeping it inside is one of the worst things we can do, as it tends to build over time before eventually exploding and causing more harm, not only to others but also to yourself.
Maybe you already know you need to feel less angry, yet you haven’t figured out how. Let me show you the signs you need to release your anger, what causes anger, and how hypnotherapy can help you.
If you or someone you know are feeling irritable, internal restlessness, sadness or frustration, you may have some pent-up anger.
Triggers can vary for each person, though there are some common causes, like feeling unheard or unappreciated, lack of acceptance of a situation, or unmet needs.
Some people can experience anger when they’re emotionally hurt, rather than feeling vulnerable to the pain, they feel anger and can feel a yearning to hurt others.
Inward anger can result in self-hatred, which can cause depression, making depression and anxiety examples of unexpressed anger.
This is experiencing anger without expressing or coping with the feelings, the anger internally festers, which results in pent-up anger.
We know anger is a valid emotion, but it does us no good to hold onto it.
Recognizing Pent-up or Repressed Anger
General symptoms of pent-up anger include:
- Not sleeping well
- Feeling on edge
- Getting irritated easily
- Feeling frustrated and irritated about trivial situations
- Criticizing or hurting others without reason
When our anger is pent-up or repressed, and when it manifests and becomes further pushed down into ourselves, it can cause slight changes to the way we feel, think, and behave consciously. Some may not notice the change until it becomes extreme, or they lash out at someone. There are early anger cues such as the heart racing, the blood pressure goes up, your cheeks get hot, and your hands shake. You’ll feel tense, restless, or on edge. These are all visible cues that many people who repress their anger describe as missing in the heat of those moments.
When we repress our anger, we get defensive when we’re accused of being angry, and we don’t want to admit when we’re frustrated, even when other people see it. This defensiveness makes it harder for us to accept and recognize our anger, making it more likely we will minimize, ignore, or deny it.
These other signs of repressed anger are worth mentioning:
- You never feel angry, rather you feel sad or depressed
- You overuse sarcasm or cynicism
- You’re uncomfortable with conflict or confrontation
- You’re overusing distraction or avoidance to cope with difficult emotions
- You become defensive when accused of being angry
- You always feel the need to have control
- You’re experiencing chronic muscle tension or headaches
- You feel uncomfortable when others share their innermost emotions with you
- You show passive-aggressive behaviour when interacting with others
- You have difficulty setting boundaries, standing up for yourself, or saying no
- You shut down, avoid people, or isolate when upset
- You become ‘explosive’ when you find yourself angry
- You complain often when things don’t go your way
- You have chronic stress or anxiety at high levels
- Negative or self-critical thoughts are a daily struggle
- You feel bitter, envious, or resentful of others
- You ignore things that bother or upset you rather than address them
- You hold grudges and ruminate on things that have caused you upset
- You feel guilty or ashamed when angry
How to Recognize the Signs of Anger
Wait, didn’t we just go through this? That’s right, we gave you the signs of pent-up or repressed anger.
Now, we can “search” within ourselves to release this anger. I’m giving you the signs of anger when it first begins, when it is first triggered.
Here are some starter questions, which may take a while to answer, but your answers will help to identify the signs you reveal when you’re angry (for example, clenched fists).
- “How do I know when I am angry?”
- “What events/people/places/things make me angry?”
- “How do I react when I’m angry?”
- “How does my angry reaction affect others?”
Physical signs of anger:
- Jaw clenching or teeth grinding
- Increased and rapid heartbeat
- Sweating, especially the palms
- Heat in the neck/face
- Shaking or trembling
- Want to get away from the situation
- Sad or depressed
- Like striking out verbally or physically
You may also notice you:
- Rub your head
- Cup your fist with your other hand
- Get sarcastic
- Lose your sense of humour
- Act abusive or abrasive
- Crave a drink, smoke, or other substance to relax you
- Raise your voice
- Begin to yell, scream, or cry
By knowing when anger is being brought on, we will be able to hopefully keep it from being pent-up or repressed if possible and find the tools to keep calm in the moment of being angry, such as mindfulness exercises.
Hypnotherapy for Anger
A tool to have in the arsenal for helping with either releasing your anger or to help with anger being brought on can be hypnotherapy.
As we’ve already mentioned, anger can be connected to depression and anxiety, which hypnotherapy helps with the symptoms of both.
The key with any issue hypnotherapy can help with is delving into the root cause of your anger.
Past experiences shape our behaviour and belief systems, so while outside stimuli (a person or situation) may appear to be causing our anger, it may be coming from within ourselves. If this is found through hypnotherapy, then as your hypnotherapist I can help you work on changing this through changing your reaction to anger triggers.
When we feel calm in stressful situations we are able to think more clearly and therefore react more appropriately.
Did you know that anger and stress can go hand in hand? Check out How Hypnotherapy Can Help with These 5 Main Causes of Stress, and learn to break the cycle before it starts.
If you’d like this helping hand to break the cycle, you’re welcome to book a hypnotherapy session with me. I’d be more than happy to help you with your questions and concerns about hypnotherapy for anger and finding your way to releasing it.
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